Each time she fell back into that hole, it seemed to get just a little bit darker. Each time, feeling as though more and more of herself was being taken away. And just as she learned how to fight off the debilitating darkness, just as she began to see the light again, the darkness would begin to grow stronger. And each time she had to fight harder and harder.
Yet with each fight, with each struggle, she gained strength. And that’s why it continued to get harder. So that she could continue to get stronger. Training for the battle that life would soon have her face.
Because this day to days struggle with the darkest of deamons, that’s not the battle she was put on this earth to face. No, that is just the practice test. The trial round.
What she was put here to confront, is something much much larger than anything she could ever comprehend. Something greater than she could ever imagine herself.
So with each punch in the gut, each kick life threw at her, each fall that once again sent her spiraling down into the darkest of holes, she continued to persevere. Knowing there was a light. And that that light would not stay hidden forever.
And even as she at times sat nearly lifeless, ashamed and numb, at what she thought was the lowest of lows, she held on to that purpose — the purpose she did not yet know of, but that she trusted so.
Because this life is not about us. It’s not about our struggle between darkness and light. It’s not about how many times we get knocked down and get back up. It’s not about the failures we overcome or the successes we get to celebrate.
It’s about the strength we gain through all of that, and how we reproduce that energy to make this world a better place.
Evan Petschke 